Mary Tyler “Molly” Ivins was an American newspaper columnist, author, political commentator, and humorist. Born in California and raised in Texas, Ivins attended Smith College and the Columbia University Graduate School of Journalism. She began her journalism career at the Minneapolis Tribune where she became the first female police reporter at the paper. Ivins joined The Texas Observer in the early 1970s and later moved to The New York Times. These Molly Ivins quotes will motivate you.
Best Molly Ivins Quotes
- “I prefer someone who burns the flag and then wraps themselves up in the Constitution over someone who burns the Constitution and then wraps themselves up in the flag.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “When politicians start talking about large groups of their fellow Americans as ‘enemies,’ it’s time for a quiet stir of alertness. Polarizing people is a good way to win an election, and also a good way to wreck a country.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “I think of Texas as the laboratory for bad government.” ~ Molly Ivins
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“If his IQ slips any lower, we’ll have to water him twice a day” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Listen to the people who are talking about how to fix what’s wrong, not the ones who just work people into a snit over the problems. Listen to the people who have ideas about how to fix things, not the ones who just blame others.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “I know: “Guns Don’t Kill People.” But I suspect that they have something to do with it. If you point your finger at someone and say, “Bang, bang, you’re dead,” not much actually happens.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “What we have here, fellow citizens is a crassly egocentric, raving twit.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “So keep fightin’ for freedom and justice, beloveds, but don’t you forget to have fun doin’ it. Lord, let your laughter ring forth. Be outrageous, ridicule the fraidy-cats, rejoice in all the oddities that freedom can produce.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “On the whole, I prefer not to be lectured on patriotism by those who keep offshore maildrops in order to avoid paying their taxes.” ~ Molly Ivins
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“If you ever get to the place where injustice doesn’t bother you, you’re dead.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “I learned two things growing up in Texas. 1: God loves you, and you’re going to burn in hell forever. 2: Sex is the dirtiest and most dangerous thing you can possibly do, so save it for someone you love.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “It’s like, duh. Just when you thought there wasn’t a dime’s worth of difference between the two parties, the Republicans go and prove you’re wrong.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Margaret Atwood, the Canadian novelist, once asked a group of women at a university why they felt threatened by men. The women said they were afraid of being beaten, raped, or killed by men. She then asked a group of men why they felt threatened by women. They said they were afraid women would laugh at them.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “It’s all very well to run around saying regulation is bad, get the government off our backs, etc. Of course our lives are regulated. When you come to a stop sign, you stop; if you want to go fishing, you get a license; if you want to shoot ducks, you can shoot only three ducks. The alternative is dead bodies at the intersections, no fish and no ducks. OK?” ~ Molly Ivins
- “It is possible to read the history of this country as one long struggle to extend the liberties established in our Constitution to everyone in America.” ~ Molly Ivins
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“He was so narrow minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “The charm of Ronald Reagan is not just that he kept telling us screwy things, it was that he believed them all. No wonder we trusted him, he never lied to us. … His stubbornness, even defiance, in the face of facts (‘stupid things,’ he once called them in a memorable slip) was nothing short of splendid. … This is the man who proved that ignorance is no handicap to the presidency.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Americans are not getting screwed by the Republican Party. They’re getting screwed by the large corporations that bought and own the Republican Party.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “I am not anti-gun. I’m pro-knife. Consider the merits of the knife. In the first place, you have to catch up with someone in order to stab him. A general substitution of knives for guns would promote physical fitness. We’d turn into a whole nation of great runners. Plus, knives don’t ricochet. And people are seldom killed while cleaning their knives.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Every two years, one of the most hotly contested elections in Texas is the poll taken among members of the capitol press corps to determine who are actually the ten stupidest members of the Legislature. Two years ago, there were thirty-seven official nominees and several write-ins.” ~ Molly Ivins
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“Good thing we’ve still got politics in Texas – finest form of free entertainment ever invented.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “The impulse to make ourselves safer by making ourselves less free is an old one … When we are badly frightened, we think we can make ourselves safer by sacrificing some of our liberties. We did it during the McCarthy era out of fear of communism. Less liberty is regularly proposed as a solution to crime, to pornography, to illegal immigration, to abortion, to all kinds of threats.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “On Bill Clinton: “If left to my own devices, I’d spend all my time pointing out that he’s weaker than bus-station chili. But the man is so constantly subjected to such hideous and unfair abuse that I wind up standing up for him on the general principle that some fairness should be applied. Besides, no one but a fool or a Republican ever took him for a liberal.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Although it is true that only about 20 percent of American workers are in unions, that 20 percent sets the standards across the board in salaries, benefits and working conditions. If you are making a decent salary in a non-union company, you owe that to the unions. One thing that corporations do not do is give out money out of the goodness of their hearts.” ~ Molly Ivins
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“Either we figure out how to keep corporate cash out of the political system or we lose the democracy.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Personally, I think government is a tool, like a hammer. You can use a hammer to build or you can use a hammer to destroy; there is nothing intrinsically good or evil about the hammer itself. It is the purposes to which it is put and the skill with which it is used that determine whether the hammer’s work is good or bad.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “In Texas, we do not hold high expectations for the [governor’s] office; it’s mostly been occupied by crooks, dorks and the comatose.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “If an armed nation were a polite nation, America would be paradise. We have more than 200 million guns in private owernship here. But our manners are not getting better.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “How the American right managed to convince itself that the programs to alleviate poverty are responsible for the consequences of poverty will someday be studied as a notorious mass illusion.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Nice is a pallid virtue. Not like honesty or courage or perseverance. On the other hand, in a nation notably lacking in civility, there is much to be said for nice.” ~ Molly Ivins
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“Whenever you hear a politician carry on about what a mess the schools are, be aware that you are looking at the culprit.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Age has given me what I was looking for my entire life – it gave me me. It provided me the time and experience and failures and triumphs and friends who helped me step into the shape that had been waiting for me all my life.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Any nation that can survive what we have lately in the way of government, is on the high road to permanent glory.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “The thing about democracy, beloveds, is that it is not neat, orderly, or quiet. It requires a certain relish for confusion.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “What stuns me most about contemporary politics is not even that the system has been so badly corrupted by money. It is that so few people get the connection between their lives and what the bozos do in Washington and our state capitols.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Conservatives are fond of pointing out there are problems in this world can’t be solved by throwing money at them. There are even more that can’t be solved by dropping bombs on them.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “There is no inverse relationship between freedom and security. Less of one does not lead to more of the other. People with no rights are not safe from terrorist attack.” ~ Molly Ivins
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“The first rule of holes: When you’re in one stop digging.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Anyone who thinks humans are not capable of so fouling their own nest that the land and the waters can no longer be productive just hasn’t been paying attention.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Many a time freedom has been rolled back – and always for the same sorry reason: fear.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “We’ve had trickle-down economics in the country for ten years now, and most of us aren’t even damp yet.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Sit up, join up, get online, get in touch, find out who’s raising hell and join them. No use waiting on a bunch of wussy politicians.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “I have been attacked by Rush Limbaugh on the air, an experience somewhat akin to being gummed by a newt. It doesn’t actually hurt, but it leaves you with slimy stuff on your ankle.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “The trouble with blaming powerless people is that although it’s not nearly as scary as blaming the powerful, it does miss the point. Poor people do not shut down factories… Poor people didn’t decide to use ‘contract employees’ because they cost less and don’t get any benefits.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “It’s hard to argue against cynics – they always sound smarter than optimists because they have so much evidence on their side.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “I believe all Southern liberals come from the same starting point–race. Once you figure out they are lying to you about race, you start to question everything.” ~ Molly Ivins
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“Some days, I’d feel better with Punxsutawney Phil in the Oval Office – at least he doesn’t lie about the weather.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “When Michael Jackson, a poor black boy who grew up to be a rich, white woman, married Elvis Presley’s daughter the Scientologist. Makes you proud to be an American, dudn’t it?” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Bad policies, stupid policies, gutless policies have real consequences.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “I dearly love the state of Texas, but I consider that a harmless perversion on my part, and discuss it only with consenting adults.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Populism is the simple premise that markets need to be restrained by society and by a democratic political system. We are not socialists or communists, we are proponents of regulated capitalism and, I might add, people who have read American history.” ~ Molly Ivins Quotes
- “The United States of America is still run by its citizens. The government works for us. Rank imperialism and warmongering are not American traditions or values. We do not need to dominate the world. We want and need to work with other nations. We want to find solutions other than killing people. Not in our name, not with our money, not with our children’s blood.” ~ Molly Ivins
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“The thing is this: You got to have fun while you’re fightin’ for freedom, ’cause you don’t always win.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “What you need is sustained outrage…there’s far too much unthinking respect given to authority.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Although a life-long fashion dropout, I have absorbed enough by reading Harper’s Bazaar while waiting at the dentist’s to have grasped that the purpose of fashion is to make A Statement. My own modest Statement, discerned by true cognoscenti, is, “Woman Who Wears Clothes So She Won’t Be Naked.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “We’ve got the emPHAsis on the wrong sylLAble when it comes to crime in this country. The FBI says burglary and robbery cost U.S. taxpayers $3.8 billion annually. Securities fraud alone costs four times that. And securities fraud is nothing to the cost of oil spills, price-fixing, and dangerous or defective products. Fraud by health-care corporations alone costs us between $100 billion and $400 billion a year. No three-strikes-and-you’re-out for these guys. Remember the S&L scandal? $500 billion.” ~ Molly Ivins
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“Most of us think of government as them. Yet government isn’t Them: It’s us.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “I think most of us become nicer as we get older, less judgmental, less full of certitude; life tends to knock a few corners of us as we go through. Cancer, divorce, teenagers, and other plagues make us give up on expecting ourselves – or life – to be perfect, which is a real relief.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Freedom fighters don’t always win, but they’re always right.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Calling George Bush shallow is like calling a dwarf short.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Conservatives have been mad at the Supreme Court since it decided to desegregate the schools in 1954 and seen fit to blame the federal bench for everything that has happened since then that they don’t like.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “Texas liberals are the camels of good news. We can cross entire deserts between oases.” ~ Molly Ivins
- “We are the people who run this country. We are the deciders. And every single day, every single one of us needs to step outside and take some action to help stop this war. Raise hell. Think of something to make the ridiculous look ridiculous. Make our troops know we’re for them and trying to get them out of there. Hit the streets to protest Bush’s proposed surge. If you can, go to the peace march in Washington on Jan. 27. We need people in the streets, banging pots and pans and demanding, ‘Stop it, now!'” ~ Molly Ivins
- “It’s hard to convince people that you’re killing them for their own good.” ~ Molly Ivins
