These sarcasm quotes will inspire you. Sarcasm, the use of words that mean the opposite of what you really want to say especially in order to insult someone, to show irritation, or the use of irony to mock or convey contempt.
A collection of motivating, happy, and encouraging sarcasm quotes, sarcasm sayings, and sarcasm proverbs.
Best Sarcasm Quotes
- “Honesty is the best policy – when there is money in it.” ~ Mark Twain
- “The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced.” ~ Frank Zappa
- “Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.” ~ Oscar Wilde
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“I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.” ~ Fred Allen
- “Sarcasm is the lowest form of humor but the highest form of flattery.” ~ Benjamin Franklin
- “The world is a stage, but the play is badly cast.” ~ Oscar Wilde
- “I can fluently speak five languages: English, emoji, sexting, sarcasm and sass.” ~ Tyler Oakley
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“I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.” ~ Groucho Marx
- “The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.” ~ George Bernard Shaw
- “Don’t be humble… you’re not that great.” ~ Golda Meir
- “If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.” ~ Groucho Marx
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“When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn’t work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.” ~ Emo Philips
- “Are you always this stupid or are you making a special effort today?” ~ Russell Lynes
- “A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.” ~ Mark Twain
- “A good listener is usually thinking about something else.” ~ Kin Hubbard
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“Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.” ~ Napoleon Bonaparte
- “The 100% American is 99% idiot.” ~ George Bernard Shaw
- “Stay with me; I want to be alone” ~ Joey Lauren Adams
- “An economist is an expert who will know tomorrow why the things he predicted yesterday didn’t happen today.” ~ Laurence J. Peter
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“Sarcasm is the protest of the weak.” ~ John Knowles
- “Satire is a sort of glass, wherein beholders do generally discover everybody’s face but their own.” ~ Jonathan Swift
- “Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called everybody, and they meet at the bar.” ~ Drew Carey
- “He has no enemies, but he is intensely disliked by his friends.” ~ Oscar Wilde
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“When people are free to do as they please, they usually imitate each other.” ~ Eric Hoffer
- “Satire is a sort of glass wherein beholders do generally discover everybody’s face but their own; which is the chief reason for that kind reception it meets with in the world, and that so very few are offended with it.” ~ Jonathan Swift
- “Satire is tragedy plus time. You give it enough time, the public, the reviewers will allow you to satirize it. Which is rather ridiculous, when you think about it.” ~ Lenny Bruce
- “I have never killed any one, but I have read some obituary notices with great satisfaction.” ~ Clarence Darrow
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“Automatic simply means that you can?t repair it yourself.” ~ Frank Capra
- “Marriage is the chief cause of divorce.” ~ Groucho Marx
- “I sometimes think that God in creating man somewhat overestimated his ability.” ~ Oscar Wilde
- “Sarcasm is not the rapier of wit its wielders seem to believe it to be, but merely a club: it may, by dint of brute force, occasionally raise bruises, but it never cuts or pierces.” ~ Rex Stout
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“Strange as it may seem, my life is based on a true story” ~ Ashleigh Brilliant
- “The consumer isn’t a moron; she is your wife.” ~ David Ogilvy
- “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.” ~ Abraham Lincoln
- “Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.” ~ Mark Twain
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“A sarcastic person has a superiority complex that can be cured only by the honesty of humility.” ~ Lawrence G. Lovasik
- “I don’t know if God exists, but it would be better for His reputation if He didn’t.” ~ Jules Renard
- “If you can’t detect the sarcasm you’ve misunderstood.” ~ Lily Allen
- “We have the best government that money can buy.” ~ Mark Twain
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“Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit.” ~ Oscar Wilde
- “People do not deserve to have good writing, they are so pleased with bad.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
- “A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.” ~ Steven Wright
- “Sarcasm is a Manchester trait.” ~ Peter Hook
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“99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.” ~ Steven Wright
- “Death will be a great relief. No more interviews.” ~ Katharine Hepburn
- “Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.” ~ P. J. O’Rourke
- “Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.” ~ Ashleigh Brilliant
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“Neither irony nor sarcasm is argument.” ~ Rufus Choate
- “Sarcasm: the last refuge of modest and chaste-souled people when the privacy of their soul is coarsely and intrusively invaded.” ~ Fyodor Dostoevsky
- “Familiarity breeds contempt – and children.” ~ Mark Twain
- “I intend to live forever. So far, so good.” ~ Steven Wright
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“Why have computers? Politicians are far more calculating.” ~ Andre Brie
- “Cookbooks bear the same relation to real books that microwave food bears to your grandmother’s.” ~ Andrei Codrescu
- “My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.” ~ Mitch Hedberg
- “Sarcasm I now see to be, in general, the language of the devil; for which reason I have long since as good as renounced it.” ~ Thomas Carlyle
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“Never put off till tomorrow what you can do day after tomorrow just as well.” ~ Mark Twain
- “History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives.” ~ Abba Eban , Wise sarcasm quotes
- “In my opinion, I think sarcasm and humor in a song, without turning it into a novelty song, is really charming.” ~ Alanis Morissette
- “Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.” ~ Mark Twain
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“I want either less corruption, or more chance to participate in it.” ~ Ashleigh Brilliant
- “The spirit of sarcasm lives and thrives in the midst of universal wreck; its balls are enchanted and itself invulnerable, and it braves retaliations and reprisals because itself is a mere flash, a bodiless and magical nothing.” ~ Henri Frederic Amiel
- “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy – and Jill a wealthy widow.” ~ Evan Esar
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“I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll make an exception.” ~ Oscar Wilde
- “To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target” ~ Ashleigh Brilliant
- “My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I’m right.” ~ Ashleigh Brilliant
