These screwed up quotes will inspire you. Screwed up, unhappy and worried because of bad experiences or (of a person) emotionally disturbed; neurotic.
A collection of motivating, happy, and encouraging screwed up quotes, screwed up sayings, and screwed up proverbs.
Best Screwed Up Quotes
- “My plumbing is all screwed up. Because it turns out, I do not own a garbage disposal.” ~ Demetri Martin
- “You can almost judge how screwed up somebody is by the kind of toilet paper they use. Go in any rich house and it’s some weird colored embossed stuff.” ~ Don Van Vliet
- “I was once a student in a punk T-Shirt hooked on screwed-up scenarios. That’s how I became the esteemed cultural figure that I am today.” ~ Bruce Sterling
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“No one leaves the edit room thinking, ‘Yeah, I nailed that one!’ Everyone I know goes into their first premiere or their first screening thinking, ‘I screwed up so bad. I’m sorry, I messed up.’ It’s just a real common feeling.” ~ Mike Mills
- “If you say city to people, people have no problem thinking of the city as rife with problematic, screwed-up people, but if you say suburbs – and I’m not the first person to say this, it’s been said over and over again in literature – there’s a sense of normalcy.” ~ Eric Bogosian
- “I think it’s unfair, but they have the right as fallible, screwed-up humans to be unfair; that’s the human condition.” ~ Albert Ellis
- “It’s no surprise that things are so screwed up: everyone that knows how to run a government is either driving taxicabs or cutting hair.” ~ George Burns
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“When I tried to play something and screwed up, I’d hear some other note that would come into play. Then I started trying different things to find the beauty in it.” ~ Dimebag Darrell
- “I guess we all have a bad night now and then and really screw up. I listened to our earlier stuff and we screwed up a lot. But at least now that we are sober, when we screw up it’s for real.” ~ Joe Perry
- “For an author, the nice characters aren’t much fun. What you want are the screwed-up characters. You know, the characters that are constantly wondering if what they are doing is the right thing, characters that are not only screwed up but are self-tapping screws. They’re doing it for themselves.” ~ Terry Pratchett
- “It takes a lot of energy and creativity to make such screwed-up lives carry on. And the kind of will people have to survive, year after year, dealing with that stuff, is weirdly impressive.” ~ Jon McGregor
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“I realized that I had screwed up my life living different parts of my life in different places. I wasn’t whole. I wasn’t integrated. I wasn’t a complete person. And after that, came out, spent some time at a psychiatric hospital.” ~ James McGreevey
- “Sometimes I think God loves the ones who most desperately ache and are most desperately lost – his or her wildest, most messed-up children – the way you’d ache and love a screwed-up rebel daughter in juvenile hall.” ~ Anne Lamott
- “Who was it in Afghanistan who screwed up in Tora Bora and let bin Laden escape? It was the Bush Administration. Who leached all the resources, military and civil, from Afghanistan, creating the instability that we see there today in order to prepare for the misbegotten invasion of Iraq? It was the Bush administration. If there’s a terrorist problem today, who is responsible now? Bush has not done the job.” ~ Sidney Blumenthal
- “Mistakes don’t scare me or bother me. If I feel like I made the same mistake twice, then I feel like I’ve really screwed up. But if I make one mistake and learn from it, hey, to me in the game of life it’s just as important to know what doesn’t work as what does. So I think mistakes are a good thing.” ~ Garth Brooks , Screwed up quotes life
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“People focus on the darker female characters in my books, but for every one of those, I can also show you an equally screwed up man that no one ever comments about, or a nicer woman that no one comments about.” ~ Gillian Flynn
- “If the oncoming mutation to interstellar immortality is screwed up by the politicians, it will be because those of us who see the opportunities in modern science are not adroit enough to outmaneuver the forces of inertia, stupidity and greed. Well, if we’re not intelligent enough to overcome such obstacles, then we don’t deserve to carry off the mutation at this stage of evolution.” ~ Robert Anton Wilson
- “We’re so screwed up with our principles. We used to mock Japanese game shows where they ate bugs. Now we’re doing the same, if not worse. It’s terrifying… It seems the better the quality, the more you’re penalized… There are some very good people in television, but a lot of fools running it. They put fame ahead of talent and think someone from ‘EastEnders’ will put bums on seats.” ~ Philip Glenister
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“I think that if someone plays a video game, and then goes out and harms another human being, or themselves because of what they just saw in the video game, they were screwed up in the headlong before they got their hands on a controller.” ~ Tim Buckley
- “I’m pretty obsessive-compulsive and I’m very fast. I tend to not write for a long period of time until I can’t not write, and then I write first drafts in gallops. I won’t eat right. I forget to do my laundry. I have a dog now, and I have to remember to walk him. When I write, that takes over and I can’t do anything else. There’s something exciting about that free fall, but then my life gets really screwed up. I’ve lost lots of relationships because of my having to ignore everything.” ~ Adam Rapp , Screwed up quotes relationship
- “Everybody’s a bit screwed up, you know. You can take it as symptoms of a disorder, or you can take it as personality. Me, I’d rather think it as parts of personality.” ~ Jarvis Cocker
- “Your past doesn’t define you. Only your present and your future. If your life is screwed up, stop making excuses. What are you going to do about it today?” ~ Ingrid Weir
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“I’d like the campaigning to be about all the things they’re not going to do. Just tell me what you’re not going do! Don’t tell me what you’re going to do. Just say “I’d really like to do solar energy but I’m not going to be able to. I really want to dig holes everywhere in the country but I really won’t be able to do it because people seem to think that maybe my water will be screwed up.”” ~ Lewis Black
- “We, in America, are so screwed up when it comes to sex. That’s all we can see.” ~ William H. Macy
- “It’s like a dance, to choreograph a fight is like a dance. It’s very specific. You have to carefully plan it out. Because if someone gets hurt, then we didn’t do our job, someone screwed up. The fight choreographers and the actors involved, we messed up somewhere.” ~ Bryan Cranston
- “Life is too damn short and [screwed] up to go through it silently loving someone and never telling them how you feel. [Screw] the consequences, [screw] the implications of the actions, to hell with it all… whatever happens as a result is better than the nothingness that is inevitable with silence.” ~ Janis Joplin
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“Families are the deepest, most screwed-up relationships that we have.” ~ Antony Starr
- “We’re just as screwed up as you.” ~ Gerard Way
- “My first big acting performance was in the Marilyn Monroe biography piece, and it required frontal nudity. I talked to Mira Sorvino, my co-star, about how nervous I was because I didn’t know how my mom would react. She said, ‘Can I be completely honest with you? I’ve seen your mom in interviews, and she seems pretty screwed up. I don’t think there’s much you could do to shock a broad like that.’ And from that moment on it was big nipples to the wind!” ~ Ashley Judd
- “I pride myself on being down-to-earth. I’m from the Midwest. People who go into show business are screwed up. I romanticized about having a serene life.” ~ Craig Kilborn
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“Yes, the academic world is screwed up, and there is nothing you can do about it. But don’t worry about that. Just do what you want. If you know what you want to do and advocate for it, no one will put any energy into stopping you.” ~ Paul Feyerabend
- “Given enough time humans will screw up Wikipedia just as they have screwed up everything else, but so far it’s not too bad.” ~ Jimmy Wales
- “Sometimes, no matter how screwed up things seem, I feel like we’re all at a wedding. But you can’t just come out and say, We’re at a wedding! Have some cake! You need to create a world into which we can enter, a world where we can see this.” ~ Anne Lamott
- “This is so classic. Government comes along under the guise of fairness, fixes something, gonna make it fair, gonna make it equal, gonna make it affordable, maybe even make it free. What they end up doing is blowing it all to hell, screwing it up worse than it’s ever been screwed up, then their voters bellyache and complain about it. And the same Democrats come back and demand that something be done, because their voters need a second chance.” ~ Rush Limbaugh
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“My dad used to flush my mother’s head down the toilet. I was so screwed up.” ~ Jessica Hahn
- “One principle I’ve been fighting for that doesn’t endear me to a lot of people is that black people can be just as complicated and screwed up as white people. Our motives can be just as base and violent. Suffering does not necessarily ennoble you.” ~ Henry Louis Gates
- “You should definitely have a travel agent. Why go through all the hassle of dealing with airlines, hotels, and rental-car agencies yourself, only to see the arrangements get all screwed up, when with just a single phone call you can have a trained professional screw them up for you?” ~ Dave Barry
- “If you have had no tension in your life, never been screwed up by problems, your mortality well within your own grasp, and someone tells you that God so loved you that He gave His Son to die for you, nothing but good manners will keep you from being amused.” ~ Oswald Chambers
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“We’re all flawed, but basically, effective managers are people whose flaws are not fatal under the circumstances. Maybe the best managers are simply ordinary, healthy people who aren’t too screwed up.” ~ Henry Mintzberg
- “I’d never met a woman I considered as intelligent as me. That sounds bigheaded, but every woman I met was either a dolly-chick or a sort of screwed-up intellectual chick. And of course, in the field I was in, I didn’t meet many intellectual people anyway. I always had this dream of meeting an artist, an artist girl who would be like me. And I thought it was a myth, but then I met Yoko and that was it.” ~ John Lennon
- “Haitians weren’t screwed-up, but everything political, intellectual, and material around them is.” ~ P. J. O’Rourke
- “Some can just knock it out and some have to lock themselves in a room and get to a fever pitch of self-loathing before they turn in a first draft. . . . each writer’s process is screwed up in its own way.” ~ Warren Leight
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“Some of the funniest people I know are not screwed up in the head.” ~ Darrell Hammond
- “I very much own the fact that I’m a misfit. The Internet makes everyone realize they’re screwed up.” ~ Jenny Lawson
- “I really don’t mind dying because I figure I haven’t wasted this life. Up until my first book was published I had all this potential, people would say, and I screwed up. After it, I could say: No, I didn’t screw up.” ~ Robert M. Pirsig
- “Everyone is screwed up, broken, clingy, and scared, even the people who seem to have it more or less together. They are much more like you than you would believe. So try not to compare your insides to their outsides.” ~ Anne Lamott
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“I believe that no matter how many mistakes we’ve made; how badly we’ve really, really screwed up; how old, worn out, or dejected we’ve become; as long as there is true, steadfast ambition, all of us have an opportunity for greatness.” ~ Dave Pelzer
- “I’ve screwed up and I’ve overcommitted and it’s typical of me.” ~ Robert Metcalfe
- “Awakening the mystical kundalini prematurely is dangerous because unless you have refined your being, you’ll get all screwed up, entities, weird powers … strange things. That is why I don’t teach anyone how to open up the chakras.” ~ Frederick Lenz
- “Our current perception is very cloudy and all screwed up. As our perception increases through meditation, we’re seeing life more correctly.” ~ Frederick Lenz
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“No, I don’t think ‘The Wire’ screwed up my career at all. It’s the only reason people have heard of me. It’s only been a huge, huge, very fortunate bonus.” ~ Dominic West
- “I think people imagine going back to a time when they knew who they were and they knew what the circumstances were – if you screwed up it was your fault.” ~ Gore Verbinski
- “When you are a screwed up person, you have a responsibility to keep your normal friends from getting walked on. ‘Cos, how bad could you screw that up? And don’t say, Well, you could cause someone six months of physical therapy. ‘Cos, hey, lots of times, those exercise take places in pools and nylon tents with little plastic balls. Fun places like that. And, she gets to park up really close for a while. Haha, oh, I’m the bad guy.” ~ Christopher Titus
- “There’s a point in me where it’s beyond sad, seeing the state of the world today. It’s so screwed up. It’s terrible, and it will be getting worse and worse. More concrete everywhere, more pollution, more radioactivity. There’s no wilderness left, no pure air. They’re chopping the forests down. They’re polluting all the oceans.” ~ George Harrison
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“I think God gave us talent because he screwed up our hair” ~ Dolly Parton
- “Normal people, want to be accepted. Screwed up people, want to be accepted. It’s one of the few things we have in common. My whole life, all I ever wanted was my dad to pat me on the top of the head and go, Who’s a good boy ? Who’s a good boy? But, instead, all he ever did was wipe peanut butter on the end of my nose and laugh while I tried to lick it off.” ~ Christopher Titus
- “Normal people, fear the day their parents die. Screwed up people, fear the day their parents kill. My mum killed a guy, at my wedding. So I can pretty much check that off. But, she’s my mum. And no matter what she did I just can’t walk away from her. She gave me birth. She gave me love. She gave me the ability to make a cigarette fire look like it was started by the hot water heater.” ~ Christopher Titus
- “Oh yeah, I’m mentally screwed up for life. But I look good.” ~ Christopher Titus
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“I don’t know if child actors are necessarily more screwed up than most people.” ~ Rider Strong
- “I know certain actors are totally screwed up on drugs, yet it gets covered up. Why wasn’t I excused for ‘exhaustion’ or ‘the flu’?” ~ Drew Barrymore
- “You know how screwed up censorship is, two girls just agreed to make out naked in front of their fathers, and we went wait, don’t curse.” ~ Artie Lange
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“I love being from a screwed-up family. We have everything in my family: prescription drug abuse, mental illness, one of my uncles is a Mormon.” ~ Christopher Titus
- “Something got screwed up in terms of your priorities if you think it’s more important to get rid of the dividend tax than it is to take care of 11 million kids.” ~ David S. Broder
- “When I was growing up, there were a lot more arts in the public schools. Politically, America has screwed up on that.” ~ Julie Taymor
